By Te-Erika Patterson
There’s an old adage that says, “time heals all wounds” but the process of waiting on time to help you get through a devastating break-up, a life changing decision or a new and challenging stage in your life may sometimes feels like torture. Laden with memories of the past where things were more comfortable and more familiar while at the same time, facing an uncertain future, we sometimes feel stuck in the horrific moment and succumb to the fear of never experiencing joy again.
In our microwave society, where we expect everything we want to happen in 30 seconds or less, the patience needed to get through the trials of life often equals the boredom and frustration of watching your hair grow.
It is true that time heals all wounds, but it’s the way you choose to use that time that will bring you closer to your desired outcome. As we wait for time to pass, what we are really doing is building our faith. Without faith in the healing process, it’s easy to make the situation worse by backtracking and grasping for what you once had. Your life can not go back to the way it was, you can only move forward. Once you recognize that the waiting period is really the healing process, you’ll be free to experience the bliss of your impending success.
If life’s trials were like a deep cut or an open wound, here’s what you’ll need to help it heal.
You clean the wound by paying attention to it, examining the severity of the damage. Allow yourself to take stock of how much damage was done. Don’t feel guilty about the fact that you are hurting; no man or woman is immune to this inevitable part of life. No stage in life is permanent. Life is a continuation of thrills, pleasure and life lessons. Clean your wound by recognizing that there is a life lesson in there. Once you step outside of your “situation” and recognize it as an isolated incident instead of a portal for failure, you speed up the healing process.
The best medicine for these type of wounds will always be forgiveness. Forgive yourself first. Forgive the others who were involved once that’s done. You are allowed to make choices for your life. You are smarter than you think you are. Nothing that belongs to you can ever be taken away. If you have experienced a “loss” it wasn’t really a loss, it was more of an adjustment in your circumstances to get you back on track to where you need to be. Forgive yourself. You didn’t lose out on anything. In truth, you have made room for the right circumstances and people that are supposed to be in your life, to waltz right in and take their rightful place.
Don’t keep picking at the scab; leave it alone. Continue to take care of yourself by keeping up your appearance and enjoying the activities that bring you happiness. It’s not wise to keep your focus on the pain you are experiencing. Change your focus. Notice all of the other great experiences that are a part of your life. Do you have great friends? Is your life better than it was five years ago? If you made it through a rough time in your past you have a good reason to celebrate and an even better reason to believe you can do it again.